My stomach is in knots today

I started talking to and kinda feel for a girl that I met off IG who doesn’t live that far away from me. Ever since she first started following me I always thought she was really cute and then we started talking one day and I started to like her more. I have absolutely horrid self confidence issues, all of which were caused by huge blows in my confidence. First was when I was used to get around and I was legitimately in love with this girl (I look back now and laugh at myself) but obviously that’s a huge blow to your self esteem. That fucked with me for years and was the start of my trust issues. Second girl I met through a friend and we seemed to hit it off instantly. Had a summer romance and all that jazz and then one day she just stops talking to me (this story ties in the best with what had recently happened to me). That was and is the most devastating thing that’s ever happened to me. After this point I gave up on girls until one day I thought I found my true love. My ex girlfriend. How we met is legitimately how cheesy love movies are made. We met through Facebook and she lived over 1000 miles away. After years of talking and falling for her we finally met and started dating. Now, keep in mind that I’ve spent years of ground work to get to this point with her but she made me feel like I never did before. Anyway, we started living together but we were both going through some shit and yeah, she ended up cheating on me (worst day of my life how that all happened). I move back to new York and swear off women. Went through an awful depression from it. I did join the gym though and that was the best decision I’ve ever made for myself. Anyway (I get off track a lot) it leads to this point. Where I meet this girl off IG. I go to spend the weekend with her and it was the best I’ve ever felt. I like this girl so fucking much. It brings tears to my eyes because I’m a pansy. Anyway, I leave on Sunday and I felt good with how the weekend went. But then the communication starts to slow down. To the point where I tell her that if she wasn’t feeling me then just tell me instead of not talking much. So she tells me she’s going through some stuff and I believe her and Yeha. But I can’t help but feel that she’s pushing me away. So. I text her last night saying that I don’t like being strung along and if she doesn’t like me like that just tell me. I tell her that I feel like she’s pushing me away. She tells me she’s not trying to and she feels horrible that I feel this way. I just don’t know. I know what I felt over the weekend and it seemed with were both into each other but I always have my doubts about myself. And my mind ruins me. And my stomach is in knots. This just sucks so bad.